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  • Writer's pictureGary Montoya



Most people do not realize the magnitude of honor nor the repercussions of dishonor. Dishonor cripples you in every area of your life. Dishonor invades your prayer life, your family, your church and your workplace. Let’s further examine the magnitude of dishonor by using an illustration between husbands and wives,

“In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered.” (1 Peter 3:7)

The key to this verse is honor. Paul tells husbands they must give honor—not as an option, but as a command. The man is to esteem his wife, highly elevating and valuing her. When he withholds honor from her, his prayers are hindered. Hindered prayers are damaging not only to the husband but to the entire family. Remember, she is God’s daughter that has been entrusted to the husband. Husbands are the head of the wife (Ephesians 5:23) and will be held accountable for how he treats her, cares for her, and cultivates her. This reality is sobering and should cause men to walk in the fear of the Lord, valuing their wives with the utmost respect. Husbands are commanded in Ephesians 5:25-26 to:

• Love their wives as Christ loves the church

• Give up their life for her

• Make her holy and clean by the washing of God’s Word

Your prayers will be hindered due to dishonor. The Greek definition for the word hindered is “to cut off”. Have you ever had your phone service cut off? That is what happens to prayers when dishonor is in one’s heart, the direct line to God is “cut off”. If you are cut off, you are not going to receive any kind of miracles or answered prayers. How many men have gone years with their prayers being hindered because of withholding honor from their wives?

Nothing, according to scripture, so clearly affects your prayer life as honor does.

I notice my prayer life elevates dramatically when I honor my wife. As a matter of fact, without exaggeration, I hear from God the fastest and most concretely when I am praying seeking to honor my wife.

I could be seeking the Lord concerning ministry endeavors, daily guidance, or any need I may have; but the moment I pray about honoring my wife, the answer comes swiftly every single time. I now often ask, “How can I honor my wife?” Almost immediately the Holy Spirit will tell me, “help her with that project, vacuum the house, do the dishes, take her on a date, send her a message, help her at work, get her a gift, etc.” The answers come quickly and specifically.

If you are married, try it! Simply ask, “How can I honor my spouse today?” Watch how quickly the Holy Spirit will speak to you, and then be obedient.

I can see how my honor causes ripple effects in my marriage. Honoring literally invigorates the very core of my wife’s being. It's as if the honor I am sowing into her develops into unity between us and confidence in herself. Our relationship is fortified because of the trust honor cultivates.

One day while praying, “How can I honor my wife?” I was led to clean the house: vacuuming, laundry, cleaning the bathroom, and dishes. I am ashamed to say that for the first eight years of my marriage, I only did these tasks a handful of times. As I was completing these tasks, I genuinely asked the Lord to change my heart towards cleaning the house. When you sincerely ask God to change your heart and give Him full access, He does just that. God moved in me quickly and I began assisting with these tasks more than I ever had before. And to my surprise, what I hated doing before, I now enjoy. Through honoring my wife, my prayers were unhindered, and God answered me quickly!

Dishonor will cut off your direct line to God.

Honor will give you direct access to God.




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