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  • Writer's pictureGary Montoya



“Honor your father and mother.” This is the first commandment with a promise: If you honor your father and mother,

things will go well for you, and you will have a long life on the earth.”

(Ephesians 6:2-3)

This is the first commandment God ever gave mankind with a promise. Consider how remarkable this is: You and I have a guaranteed promise that things will go well for us if we choose to simply honor our parents. Our biological fathers and mothers are God’s authority in our lives from birth, and we are to obey them until we are married. When you get married, you are no longer under their authority, as explained in Matthew 19:5, when a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, the two are united into one. This means that those who are married will leave from under the authority of their parents and join their spouse so that God can establish a new family authority. After marriage, we are called to still honor our parents. I cannot tell you how many times I have had success after honoring my parents, even when I couldn’t see the immediate benefit of it. When you honor your father and mother, you will live a long life—a life full of faith and God’s power moving through you.

I know this is easy to do when someone has good or godly parents. WHERE THE CHALLENGE LIES is when parents are not loving, caring, responsible for providing or protecting their children. Neglect can come in many shapes and the truth is no parent is ever perfect. However, I want to challenge you to still honor them even in these situations, as your honor will speak volumes to them. Your life will radiate, and your parents will see God in you and through you. Death and life are in the power of your words, speak life to your parents.

  • Tell them you love them often

  • Tell them you respect them

  • Honor them with your words and actions

  • Let God do the rest.

I want to mention that if someone is in a physically or sexually abusive home, honoring your parents does not mean you have to allow them to abuse you. Seek help from the authorities (pastors, teachers, police department, etc.)Those parents are breaking the law. You can love and honor your parents without being in the same home if there is abuse.

This promise of blessing definitely applies to honoring our physical parents, but it goes much further and deeper, extending to our spiritual parents as well. The relationship of a spiritual son and father is unique, many times surpassing that of flesh and blood. On one occasion, Jesus was teaching in a house and His mother Mary came to the door looking for Him. Someone yelled to Jesus, “Your Mother and brothers are at the door.” And Jesus’ responded, “My mother and my brothers are all those who hear God’s word and obey it” (Luke 8:21). Jesus was making it crystal clear that spiritual DNA transcends physical DNA. It is one thing to be family by blood, but another thing to be family in spirit. One family unit is temporal, the other is eternal. Paul himself was a spiritual father, he said to the Corinthian church, “…I became your father in Christ Jesus when I preached the Good News to you” (1 Corinthians 4:15). Other times he mentions his spiritual sons Timothy and Onesimus (1 Timothy 1:2, Philemon 1:10).

Who are your fathers and mothers in the faith? Who are your spiritual leaders? If you apply the kingdom principle of honor to them, things will go well for you and you will be successful in your calling. This is a promise you can invest your whole life in because it’s guaranteed from God the Father Himself.


It is not God’s will for His children to suffer poverty. Although God does not desire for any of His children to be in poverty or need, we sometimes encounter circumstances in which we are subjected to financial crises. Even through those times, God promises to provide for our needs if we honor Him. Our Father promises His children that we will never lack (Psalm 23:1, Philippians 4:19). Even the children of Israel while in the wilderness had all of their needs met. One of the main ways God desires us to honor Him is in the area of our finances, yet this tends to be one of the most difficult areas to conquer for most people. God promises that if we honor Him with our income, multiplication will be amplified in our lives. Look at what Proverbs says:

“Honor the Lord with your wealth and with the first and best part of all your income.

Then your barns will be full, and your vats will overflow with fresh wine.” (Proverbs 3:9-10 GW)

One of the main ways we honor God is by financially supporting the local church. See what Paul says to those who honor God with their finances: “God will generously provide all you need. Then you will always have everything you need and plenty left over to share with others… For God is the one who provides seed for the farmer and then bread to eat. In the same way, he will provide and increase your resources and then produce a great harvest of generosity in you. Yes, you will be enriched in every way so that you can always be generous.” (2 Corinthians 9:8, 10-11)

Honoring God with your finances will ensure you have plenty left over to share with others and enable you to be generous. God wants you to always be generous so you can help meet the needs of the church and support the work of various ministries. I know giving is a struggle for a lot of people, because the questions always come up, “what about my house, and what about my bills?” When you put God first in this area, God takes care of the rest (Matthew 6:33).


We already know God is attractive in every way, but the world doesn't know this. They are entirely blind. They have never met God. Here is the good news- they have met you! Here is the bad news- they have met you! This is laughable but true. Have you ever thought that you are the only Bible some people will ever read? You are a child of God, you reflect Him. Did you ever think that you could make God and His Word attractive?

“Slaves must always obey their masters and do their best to please them. They must

not talk back or steal, but must show themselves to be entirely trustworthy and good.

Then they will make the teaching about God our Savior attractive in every way.

(Titus‬ 2:9-10)‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬

When we are honorable, people of integrity, we make the gospel attractive to others. We have the ability to display His beauty on earth. He is awe-inspiring and He is Wonderful (Isaiah 9:6), but the world doesn't know Him, they know us. It brings a whole new meaning to what Jesus said, “Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father!”(John 14:9). Can you say that about yourself? If people see you, have they seen God? Peter addresses the attractiveness of honor when speaking to wives in 1 Peter:

“In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands.

Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words.

They will be won over by observing your pure and reverent livesThis is how the holy women of old made themselves beautiful. They put their trust in God and accepted the authority of their husbands.”

(1 Peter 3:1-2, 5)

Peter is saying that the reason holy women are beautiful is that they trust God and honor their husband's authority. They aren’t doormats who are trampled on, but they honor the God-ordained leadership that God has given husbands. It is through honor and their godly lives that the message of the gospel is spoken. Our godly lives will speak louder than words ever could. We are still called to preach the gospel to the nations, but we also want to “win people over by our pure and reverent lives.” Unbelievers have seen the world's beauty, which is skin deep and fades quickly. However, when they meet believers who are Christ-like, they will be attracted to them and want to know more about what sets them apart.

Honor allows Christ’s beauty to radiate through us.




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